If you’re getting ready to propose, you’re probably feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. Planning a wedding proposal is a big moment, and it can feel like a lot of pressure, especially if you’re trying to keep it a surprise. The good news is that there are lots of different ways to propose, from the classic surprise proposal to planning your proposal together (yes, really!). Every relationship is different, and your proposal should reflect that. There is no single “best” way to propose. There is only the way that feels the most authentic to the two of you.
In this guide, I’ll walk you through a few different ways to propose, including:
- Classic surprise proposals
- Loosely planned proposals
- Photo session proposals
- Low-key, private proposals
- Non-traditional and creative proposals
I’ll also share how to choose the approach that feels right for your relationship, a few planning tips to help the day go smoothly, and how working with a photographer can make the whole experience feel even more relaxed. Here’s everything you need to know about the different ways to propose.
Different Ways to Propose (and Who They’re Best For)
While your proposal can look however you want it to, there are a few different approaches that I see couples choose most often. Each one creates its own unique experience, so it really comes down to what feels the most natural for your relationship.
The Classic Surprise Proposal
When most people picture a proposal, this is probably what comes to mind. One partner gets down on one knee, completely catches the other off guard, and asks them to marry them.
It’s one of the most popular ways to propose for a reason. It’s exciting, emotional, and often filled with big reactions you can only experience once. If your partner loves surprises, this type of proposal can be a really fun way to celebrate this huge milestone together.
Photographing this type of proposal usually means your photographer is hiding behind a nearby rock, tree, or building until the big moment happens. Then I pop out to document all of the real reactions as they unfold. Nothing about this proposal type is staged or overly posed, and it’s just the excitement of the moment.
Classic Proposal Considerations
If you’re thinking about planning a surprise proposal, there are a few things worth considering ahead of time. The biggest one is making sure a surprise proposal actually feels right for your partner. Some people absolutely love being surprised, while others would rather have a little heads up that it’s coming.
You’ll also want to think about things like what you’ll both be wearing, especially if you’re planning to have the moment photographed.
Location can make a big difference, too. If you’re proposing somewhere popular, you may have to work around crowds or choose a quieter spot nearby.
Additionally, I always recommend planning your proposal photography around the light when possible. Proposing closer to golden hour usually gives you the softest light and makes the photos feel even more magical.
Finally, having a plan with your photographer, along with a backup plan in case something changes, will help the whole experience feel much more relaxed.
The Loosely Planned Proposal
Not every couple wants a surprise proposal, and that’s completely okay. If that sounds like you, a loosely planned proposal can be a great option. With this approach, both partners know a proposal is coming, whether that’s during a trip, within a certain timeframe, or in a specific place. They just don’t know exactly when it will happen.
This style of proposal takes away a lot of the pressure that can come with keeping everything a secret, and can help make the whole experience feel a little more relaxed. It also gives you more flexibility to include family (or even your dog!), plan a fun activity afterward, or simply make sure you both feel great in what you’re wearing. From a photography perspective, this type of proposal is easier to plan around the best light and location, which can make a big difference in your photos.
The best part is that you can still have an element of surprise if that’s important to you. Even if your partner knows a proposal is coming, they don’t necessarily know exactly when you’ll ask. You still get all of the genuine emotions and excitement of the moment, just without as much of the logistical stress that can come with planning a complete surprise.
The “Photo Session” Proposal
If having beautiful photos of the moment is important to you or your partner, a photo session proposal might be the perfect fit. With this approach, one partner thinks they’re simply showing up for a couples session, and the proposal happens naturally during the shoot.
Since the photographer is already there, you don’t have to worry about hiding, perfect timing, or coordinating every little detail behind the scenes. Your photographer can also help guide you to the best lighting, avoid crowds if needed, and make sure everything flows naturally. Plus, you’ll already be dressed in outfits you feel great in, which is one less thing to think about.
This kind of proposal is a great fit for couples who love having their relationship documented or want to make photography part of the experience from the very beginning. You can spend the day exploring, adventuring, or simply enjoying time together before stepping into the proposal itself. And because your photographer is already there, you don’t have to worry about keeping a secret or coordinating a photographer hiding in the bushes. Instead, you can be fully present in the moment, knowing you’ll have beautiful photos to remember it all by.
The Low-Key, Private Proposal
Not every proposal needs to happen at an epic location. In fact, some of the most meaningful ones are simple, intimate, and completely private. That could look like getting down on one knee during your favorite neighborhood walk, at home in your living room, or anywhere else that feels meaningful to the two of you.
These kinds of proposals are all about slowing down and focusing on the two of you. If a quiet, personal moment that feels true to your relationship sounds more like you, this can be a beautiful way to get engaged.
These types of proposals are also a little easier from a planning standpoint since you don’t have to think through as many logistics. And if you’d still love photos to remember the day, your photographer can always meet you afterward to document all the excitement of being newly engaged.
Non-Traditional & Creative Ways to Propose
Maybe you’re the kind of couple who wants your proposal to feel a little different from the traditional version. Luckily, there are tons of ways to propose that don’t fit into any typical mold.
That could mean both partners being involved in planning the proposal, or even creating a moment where you both get to ask the big question. And you don’t have to get down on one knee at all. Maybe you’re sitting together during a picnic, sharing a quiet moment at home, or even somewhere in the middle of an adventure like rock climbing.
You can also bring in little details that make the proposal feel completely personal to you. Incorporate an inside joke, include your partner’s favorite food, or create a moment that only the two of you would understand. I’ve even had one partner attach a ring to a cow at Highland Farms, which then walked over to the couple and became part of the proposal!
The biggest thing to remember is that there’s no wrong way to propose. The best proposal is the one that feels authentic to your relationship and creates a memory you’ll both want to look back on for years to come.
Once you’ve popped the question, it’s time to celebrate! And what better way to soak in this season of your relationship than with an engagement session? I’ve put together a guide with my best tips for making the most of your session and creating photos that feel like you.
Choosing the Right Way to Propose For Your Relationship
Now that we’ve covered some of the most common ways to propose, you’ll want to make sure you choose the proposal style that feels the most like your relationship. When you’re planning your proposal, one of the first things to think about is your and your partner’s personalities.
If you’re naturally more extroverted, love being around people, or would be excited by a surprise in a beautiful location, then a classic proposal might be the perfect fit. But if you’re more introverted, don’t love being the center of attention, or would rather avoid the pressure of a surprise, a more planned or low-key proposal might feel much more natural.
It’s also important to think about how you and your partner want to feel in the moment, not just how you want it to look. In fact, choosing what feels right for the two of you matters much more than following tradition. A proposal is a big step in your relationship, and it should reflect who you are as a couple. If that means something more traditional, that’s great, but it doesn’t have to. At the end of the day, it’s your proposal, not anyone else’s.
How to Make Your Proposal Easier to Photograph
When it comes to photographing a proposal, there are a few things to keep in mind that can make the entire experience feel a little smoother for everyone involved.
Consider the Time of Day
First, the time of day can make a big difference when it comes to your photos. If you have flexibility in your schedule, I usually recommend planning outdoor proposals around golden hour, when the light is softer and more flattering.
You’ll also want to think about crowds. Choosing an earlier time of day or a location that’s a little more off the beaten path can help you avoid sharing the space with as many people.
Be Intentional About Your Location Choice
Your specific location can also play a big role in how easy it is to photograph. A spot that’s a short walk from your car will usually be simpler than somewhere that requires a longer hike.
Similarly, it’s good to consider where your photographer can realistically hide or stand before the proposal happens. If you’re choosing a location without many hiding spots, you may want to consider a proposal style that doesn’t rely on a surprise.
Create a Plan With Your Photographer
Lastly, having a general idea of how the day will flow with your photographer can make everything feel much more relaxed. One thing I always suggest is having your proposal at the beginning of the photo session. That way, afterward, you can slow down and spend time taking portraits while fully soaking in that newly engaged feeling.
Planning Your Proposal With a Photographer
As you start planning your proposal, reaching out to your photographer early can help make the whole process feel much smoother. After coming up with a rough idea, we can work together to refine the details.
When I work with couples on proposals, I usually talk through things like timing, the ideal location, and any backup plans in case something needs to change. We’ll also discuss whether a second photographer would be helpful, especially for more complex locations or if you’re hoping for multiple angles, along with any questions you have throughout the process.
Planning these details ahead of time can help avoid unnecessary anxiety, especially if you’re meeting somewhere with limited service, dealing with unpredictable traffic, or working around a specific timeline. This is especially important for things like sunset proposals, where the timing matters a little more. Having a solid plan in place means you can focus less on the logistics and more on enjoying the moment when it happens.
What Happens After You Propose?
After you propose, you can finally take a deep breath and soak in that newly engaged feeling! From there, the day naturally transitions into an engagement-style photo session. This is when I’ll document the afterglow of the proposal, the excitement of your new chapter, and all of the joy you’re feeling together. I’ll also photograph the little details, like ring photos and other small moments that help tell the full story of your proposal.
There are so many ways to propose, and there’s no right or wrong way to do it. Whether you’re planning a grand adventure, dreaming up something completely unexpected, or keeping things quiet and personal, what matters most is choosing something that feels meaningful and true to the two of you. And if you’re not sure where to start, I’m always happy to help you dream up a proposal that feels intentional, personal, and completely you.
